


It's always a Rocky Road Ahead

by lazetta_croft



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Iron Man: Armored Adventures
Genre: Angst, Arc Reactor, Arc Reactor Issues, Dark Tony, Depression, Gen, Hurt Tony Stark, Self Acceptance, Self Esteem Issues, Self assesment, Tony Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-23 19:19:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16165271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazetta_croft/pseuds/lazetta_croft
Summary: Tony's take on his daily life and how he feels about the reactor and everything. angsty tony! dark!tony





	It's always a Rocky Road Ahead

I never knew walking could be this difficult.

The implant gives me a lot of trouble. It moves when I move. Jumping is never an option. If I jump, It does too. And that hurts.  
If I had known what would happen once I get home, I would have never escaped my death.  
I feel like a cripple. A handicapped person. A disabled person. My life has been butchered into two. Iron man and Tony stark. Both are difficult to live as. Iron man struggles to live , Tony stark struggles to die.

I have panic attacks now. I can't sleep. Usually I run off during the night to my lab. Modify the suits, fry baddies. Some times, I think, staring of in the dark space,marvelling myself at what I have become.  
The other times, I think if it is worthy to keep the reactor in. It is a matter of seconds that the tech marvel makes its way to my hand.

I doubt if I am still sane.

Who could be? Who could be if people are wolfing for your life and your life is so easy to take?  
Everything is awful. When I hear people bitching about me and fangirling iron man. When Happy tells me that I have changed, in a good way. Does he know how much pain , it takes to be iron man?! With each boost of the thrusters, how much does it hurt, does he know? Does anybody know? Does anybody care whether iron man is fine or not?! Does anybody care asking why is he iron man?

Nobody does.

If I say Pepper and Rhodey do, I would be lying to myself.

They don't. They love me. They do not know why I am still iron man. After going through so much pain. It sounds ugly, but it is the truth.

I don't care.

I have faced whiplash.

I have faced the mandarin.

I have faced things which no one has.

I have faced life.

I can face the pain.

Because every hero has a story, and it is not easy.


End file.
